Stags not allowed! Delhi men have a hard time getting into pubs and clubs unless they're accompanied by women or foreigners. This was our experience over the past few weeks as we explored the nightlife of the city.
Now that the 'Let's catch a drink after work' culture is picking up pace, nightclubs are trying to outdo each other with special nights and packages. These include expat nights and ladies nights, which have become the talk of town. What has not changed, however, is the reluctance of many clubs to let unaccompanied men in.

Going solo
HT City photo coordinator Zabeeh Afaque found he wasn't allowed in at most watering holes for a drink. Afaque was part of the HT City team that went to investigate a problem men in this city are familiar with - most clubs and pubs in the city have a 'no entry' for single men.
We checked out 18 nightspots in the NCR and found at least five that discriminated by letting in single expat men but denied entry to Indian stags.
The city is throbbing with 'nights' that are hosted at places like Urban Pind, Ivy and Kuki.
Urban Pind and Kuki both have popular expat nights on Thursdays with the following special offers Urban Pind: Thirst-day nights have an unlimited IMFL drinks offer at Rs 550 (plus taxes) and Kuki has free drinks through the evening for all expat women and the fIrst 50 Indian women who enter.

Strict policy
Kashif Farooq, co-owner, Urban Pind, the Urban Bar, while talking about the strict couple-only policy says, "These days stags take entry one by one and then form a big
group inside. We think that's unsafe for the women who are new to the country. Honestly, foreigners understand each other better and know how to talk to or approach women. Rules are for everyone. We've often been told to soften our stand on entry but we'd rather lose business than risk an unpleasant event."
Rummy Sharma of Kuki however feels that these nights pull in the crowds on a dull day and the special tag ups the excitement level. But
he's quite clear about who's most important

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Straight men have huge egos

One of the strongest ways in which men are heteosexualised is by giving them an extremely strong and enormous ego. Consequently, Straight men have HUGE egos.
What is this ego really? An ego can be roughly translated as a false, negative pride, a haughtiness.
This False ego passes off for natural manhood in men. However unlike men whose pride is built on natural manhood, this ego is hollow and hence all those powerful men appear extremely hollow if you peep within. Women have been complaining this for generations. But they hardly realise that they've been an instrument in this as well.
Unfortunately, the enormous social recognistion that makes this ego is given only once when proves that he has fought with and mutilated his inner self, his real, natural manhood -- especially his need for another man.
And therefore, straight men have such trouble accepting their sexual need for another man, to own such feelings, because this huge ego stands between them and their own feelings.
And this is why straight men take forever to come to terms with themselves when they unwittingly get into a relationship with another man. They have to struggle a lot to and they could never take any initiatives or acknowledge their love or interest in the guy they love dearly. Because, the huge wall of ego prevents their feelings from coming out in the open.
If the relationship is ever acknowledged, even if only in the privacy with the man they've been having sex with for several days, they'd break the relationship most cruelly, however involved they maybe... because they'd rather prefer death than acknowledge their sexual interest in another man. Their intense feeling for their lover may be very high during this time, but not higher than the enormous wall of ego.
Of course Ego is not the only factor, but one of the important factors that comes in the way of straight men and their sexual need for men.
The Ego makes men haughty, unapproachable and stiff as steel when faced with a situation where their sexual need for men is invoked even in the slightest manner -- which means that they have to be this way often, since unless they do that, the feelings can always come out and overpower them.
The forces of heterosexualisation that are in power have thus bought the souls of men, by giving them fake but enormous ego that they are afraid of breaking. So they do as the forces of heterosexualisation want them to do.

the hypocrisy of 'gays'

When you look at all this scare that the heterosexual society has created around the term 'gay' that it has developed in the first place, then you find it so strange and hypocritic of the self-identified gays (who are basically feminine gendered guys to various degrees, including straight-acting -- i.e. those who mask their effeminacy by acting masculine, but it doesn't really work), to claim that 'gay' only means what it is defined as, i.e., a man who is attracted to another man, and there's no other meeaning attached by the society to it. That, especially, there's no gender aspect associated with it.
They seem to sincerely believe in this "gay = sexual interest in men' definition, because it suits them and papers up their femininity under a misleading 'sexual' identity. They seek to remove the 'effeminate' reality by not acknowledging it as a part of the definition of 'gay' and treating the effeminacy of gays as just incidental (taking resort to the few misguided straight guys into the gay community, and the straight-acting ones to show that 'gay' doesn't really mean 'effeminate').
The gays have gone to the extent of changing history and historical spaces of who today comprise of the 'gay' space -- such as catamites, berdaches, etc. by removing the effeminate part from these definitions, or in any case highlighting them as ancient 'sexual' identities, rather than 'gender' identities that they were.
If you look at the 'gay' or 'homosexual' articles on wikipedia, that is written by gays themselves, you will find hardly any reference to the connotations that it means effeminate or feminine gendered. This is social engineering on their part.
However, this papering can only be done in their own small LGBT space. What's happening in the wider society, that affects billions and trillions of men, and a similar number of boys, adolescents and young males (who are the most severely affected) is totally different.

The scare of 'gay'

They're creating a lifestyle, a scare that anything except exclusive, constant and active 'heterosexuality' is gay, not only that, this gay straight, divide is not only limited to sexuality, but also in all social and personal spheres of men (the only exception is culture and family settings, because culture is still strong, and forces of heterosxualisation can't beat it yet), so that you can't only become 'gay' (and thus third sex), by having sex with a guy, but also by being too friends with a guy, by not having a girl in your group, by having men groom you (like barbars, etc.) and in all other social spheres. This gives their society not only an immense handle/ mechanism to control the sexual behaviour of men, but also their social behaviour, their attitudes, etc. that have little to do with sexuality, so deeply, that it could never have gotten if it had not created this scare.
You can judge the enormity of this scare by the fact that the youth, whcih is still insecure about his manhood is threatened to make sure that he is not seen too much with men, he doesn't go to a movie with only a male-friend, that he doesn't seem as physically close with a male friend (even things like holding hands), and they're very scared to form close bonds with men, lest they're thought of as 'gay'.
In the highly heterosexualised West, the gay scare has penetrated so deeply into men's spaces, that men as a group and as individulas have become extremely weak, with fewer and fewer rights and personal freedom, just like the bonobos. The effect of this scare has been that today, in the west, there's no such thing as men's spaces (unless you count the third sex, non-man, half-male, half-female, gay space as men's spaces), and no such thing as 'men' as a group or as a community or as a distinct class of people. The identity of a man has become totally dependant on women, so much so that he is nothing on his own, without a woman.

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People will discard incorrect labels.

Labels are meant to easily and correctly define themselves. If they fail to be fair and correct in their definition and their use, they may have power, because favoured by those in control, however, people will just not take those labels, even if it means giving up their own qualities. And this is what is happening when most men (straight men) rather disown their sexual need for men, than accept the 'gay' label, which is incorect and unfair.

The only people who use the 'gay' label are those who fit in the misdefinitions and incorrect usage.

Today men have no leeway to say 'no' to a woman

Now-a-days (in heterosexual societies), if a girl approaches you, you have very little lee way to say no. And if you say no, without giving an acceptable answer, that can save your 'heterosesxual' image, like by 'proving' that you're already involved... then she will immediately think, you're 'gay'. And girls have a lot of power -- they're the one to provide manhood to men and to make or break a man. So, if a girl says it, men really take it to heart. I mean there's no way you can counter a woman who calls you 'gay'. Now the word has social validity. In the past, you would have been perfectly valid to hit the woman if she said such a thing. But, women have too much power today, for you to do that. You cannot call her a whore, because what she's doing is held perfectly normal by the heterosexual society. In any case, whores are really valued by the heterosexual society, and they won't attach a negative name to it, just like 'homo' is really valued in the men's spaces.

So what can a man do in such a case. Because, if a woman calls him 'gay' although women think that manhood is a superficial thing, it can ruin his life. He will be treated like an outcaste in the men's spaces and will lose all respect and dignity.

So, men either give in to the sexual demands of women, and this is sexual abuse... not only by the women, who may not even know that they are abusing those men, because, the men have to make them believe that they like what they're doing, but also by the society, which forces men to not only to submit to sexual abuse, but also to grin and bear it --- just like they were made to grin and bear being circumsised or being engraved in blood, while being fully conscious.

But, those who are adept at it, try to get away from it, without losing their straight status by weaving enormous webs around themselves... they may not refuse the girls, and pretend to be going around with them, but try to delay the sexual part as far as possible... by weaving innumerable webs... by shifting from one girl to another... endlessly, by making endless stories. This is very oppressive for men, not only becasue it builds such extreme stress, but also because, they have to give to it a big chunk of their time, in the prime of their life, when they could have done so much with it, to fulfill their true potentialities. And also oppressive because, in all the webs that they build, they get lost themselves, they cut off themselves with their own natural selves, their own true manhood and also from those who they really need in life, and who can give them the love and companionship they really, truly desire.

Ego is not manhood

The extreme ego that a heterosexual image, however fake, gives men, is the thing that passes off for their manhood/ masculinity. It makes them look really masculine, even when their real natural masculinity is suppressed.

Boys keep talking about man to man sexual feelings negatively

There's no space for men to talk about man to man sexual feelings in any real or healthy or positive way, in the mainstream heterosexualised men's spaces. The only space they have to talk about it is negatively. And when boys are dealing with their intense same-sex needs, when it comes popping up, and they need to crush it time and again, and they need to talk about it when these feelings bother them, then they can only do it negatively. And so, they keep talking about it negatively. Its always on their mind.

Like this college freind of mine, who I know has an intense sexual need for men... He is always making fun of 'gay', always talking about it in a funny manner, "like saying, "haw, are you gay that you are sitting so close?" or "Look at those gays" when he sees two men holding hands. Its damn funny at that time. But, it takes away whatever little space is left in the heterosexualised spaces. This guy does this too much.

Also, this guy is a bit soft. I think he would fit in gay very much... But the other guy who is masculine and I know has an intense interest in men, and hardly any in women, but nevertheless tries to prove it all the time, he does't like to talk about 'gay' at all, and in fact gets pissed off with the other guy doing it too much. However, when he needs to talk about it (negatively of course), then he is really mean, hostile and threatening. Then it looks like he really means harm, and that he believes in what he is saying. He probably does. Inspite of his own feelings, which he will never acknolwedge, unless he somehow gets the courage and develops his natural mahoood.

Men must be trained, not to talk about 'gay' at all, since they can't talk positively about it. Till the time that we can find a way of finding a space to talk about man to man sexual need without forcing the gay label on it, within the straight/ men's spaces.

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Right to love a man without being labelled gay

Men would get their right the day people say about a man falling in love iwht another man and not and ot a 'gay' man fell in love with another gay man, or two male pair instead of a 'gay' pair,

Heterosexual brand of masculinity is fake

Heteroseuxal brand of masculinity is only skin deep, just a sham... it involves only taking the 'looks' of the real macho man, but not his essence -- how could they, when heterosexuality is so contrary to masculinity. E.g. these heterosexual men may look big and muscled from all that gym work, but they lack courage, the will to fight and especially inner fights. To top it all, they lack real character. But they were not meant to be that way. It is their heterosexualisation that has made them like this.

Pressure to be heterosexual, and not just to exaggerate an interest in having sex with women

Pressure to exaggerate sexual need for men is taken to the extreme in a heterosexual society, and now it does not remain a pressure to exaggerate need for sex, but to pretend a need for social and emotional bonding with women, which is completely unnatural for men.

Afterall, men have been resenting marriage eversince the institution was built ages ago.

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No connection between Heterosexuality and manhood

There is no natural association between manhood and heterosexuality or a desire to have sex with women or even with reproduction.

It's only that heterosexuality has been made a precondition for granting social manhood by the society for so long that it is now considered naturally equivalent to manhood.

And this is the myth that we need to break.

There's no such thing as homo, hetero or bi, only man, woman and third gender

There are no heterosexuals, homosexuals, bisexuals or any such things.

There are just three kinds of genders:
Men, women or the third gender

And, therefore, you're either a Man, a Woman or a member of the Third Sex.

And, if you're a man, you may be attracted to men, women, third gender, no one, everyone, animals, inanimate objects..... It just doesn't matter. You will remain a man and just a man.

And if you're third gender, you may again devote your entire life loving a woman, you will remain a third gender.

The division on the basis of sexual orientation is just plain absurd and misleading, and the first reason is that it doesn't recognise the three human genders. It works in a binary gender assumption, and instead defined the third sex space wrongly as 'homosexual', by clubbing masculine gendered and feminine gendered males together into it..., while the straight space wrongly classifies straight men as 'heterosexual', when their heterosexuality is, for the most part, socially engineered and produced through social pressures.

How are men made Heterosexual in the West

The heterosexuality of men in Western societies is achieved as follows:
- One is conditioning... and it works on some men.
- The other is pressurising those who could not be properly changed, to pretend heterosexuality, by wearing masks...
- The rest of the work is done by the society by manipulating the social image by suppressing all information, news, etc. of the evidence of existence of same-sex needs in the mainstream male space, and only talking about it in the context of 'gays'. And in this last conspiracy, media and entertainment has a very important role to play.
The Media and entertainment industry will block out everything that relates to intimacy between men*, and show largely artificial images of 'heterosexuality'. And, they are greatly helped by the fact that all straight men take great pains to hide their sexual and other inclinations for other men, and take equal pains to portray a 'heterosexual' image of themselves. Add to it the queers who publicly maintain that they are the only people apart from women who have a sexual need for men, no one ever questions the media, and the resultant heterosexual image is taken as the natural way of things to be.
Of course, whenever the media does talk about man to man intimacy, it is always in the context of 'gay', which information is then heavily shunned by the mainstream spaces for the fear of isolation. The media thus sidetracks man to man intimacy, even when it is talked about in the context of straight men.

* To take an example, the Western society socially engineers pressures on straight men that they must want to be groomed by women, if they're straight. Now, in reality very few men would like to do something like that. Especially, when it is about personal care that involves issues of privacy (involves nudity, etc.).
Now a very small minority will take very well to this requirement and they will thrive under it. But amongst the vast majority, some will force themselves to be groomed by women, even if they don't like it -- whether its getting a body massage done, or shaving off pubic hair. Others will lead a rather private life, and will quietly go to a man to get personal grooming done. However, they will never talk about it. When in a group the males who use women's help brag about their 'achievements', the other men will just keep quiet.
And in the media, you will only find men being groomed by women, including shaving off their body hair. Now, the media neither has the capability to show what men do on the sly, nor will it be interested in exposing this part of men, even if stares them in the nose.

Youth beaten to death in Khajuri Khas for harassing woman

Express News Service

New Delhi, August 17 A 19-year-old died after being severely beaten up in Khajuri Khas, northeast district. He had been caught eve teasing.
The incident occurred around 4 pm on Sunday.

According to the police, Dipender, who was known to misbehave with local girls, had entered a home, passed lewd comments about one of the women and escaped.

The furious family, alongwith a few locals, chased him to his home and called him out. They took him to Gali number 5, and attacked him with sticks. Dipender received several blows on his head and lay in a pool of blood for nearly an hour. The police took him to the GTB hospital, where he was declared dead on arrival.

Jaspal Singh, the Deputy Commissioner of Police (northeast district), said: “Dipender had been released from jail ten days ago.” In fact, he had been to jail several times already.

Dipender’s father, Deen Dayal Rai, has a shop in the locality.

A senior police officer added that from initial investigations, it appears that it was not a case of lynching, as most of his attackers belonged to the family whose home he had entered.

The locals however, were furious with him, as he had misbehaved with another girl just two days ago. On that occasion, a heated argument had broken out between him and a few locals.

A case has been registered at the Khajuri Khas police station and further investigations are on. “No one has been arrested yet,” DCP Singh added.

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Single people as healthy as married counterparts

The Times of India
11 Aug 2008, 1538 hrs IST, IANS,TNN



Health status of single people has improved (Getty Images)

Single persons are becoming almost as healthy as their married counterparts, according to a new study.

Hui Liu of Michigan State University and lead researcher of the study said sociologists since the 1970s have emphasised that marriage benefits health, more so for men than for women.

"Married people are still healthier than unmarried people," Liu said, "but the gap between the married and never-married is closing, especially for men".

Researchers analysed National Health Interview Survey data from a 30-year period between 1972 to 2002 and found that while the self-reported health of married people is still better than that of the never-married, the gap has closed considerably.

The trend is due almost exclusively to a marked improvement in the self-reported health of never-married men. Liu said that may be partly because never-married men have greater access to social resources and support that historically were found in a spouse.

Further, the research shows that the health status of the never-married has improved for all race and gender groups examined: men, women, blacks and whites. The health of married women also improved, while the health of married men remained stable.

"Politicians and scholars continue to debate the value of marriage for Americans," the researchers wrote, "with some going so far as to establish social programs and policies to encourage marriage among those social groups less inclined to marry, particularly the poor and minorities".

But the research findings "highlight the complexity of this issue" and suggest that "encouraging marriage in order to promote health may be misguided".

In contrast, the self-reported health for the widowed, divorced and separated worsened from 1972 to 2003 relative to their married peers. This held true for both men and women, although the widening gaps between the married and the previously married groups are more pronounced for women than for men.

The findings of Liu and fellow researcher Debra Umberson of the University of Texas will appear in the September issue of the Journal of Health and Social Behaviour.

Old News: Student held for Hyderabad double murder

The Hindu
Sunday, Aug 06, 2006
Staff Reporter

The accused, a first-year hotel management student, allegedly stabbed two of his seniors while being ragged



NEW DELHI: A student of Indian Institute of Hotel Management in Hyderabad who allegedly killed two of his seniors while being ragged on July 31 has been arrested by the Crime Branch of the Delhi police.

According to the police, Naveen Kumar Sirohiwal, a resident of Rohini, was arrested at New Delhi railway station on Friday.

During interrogation, he allegedly confessed to having killed his two seniors, Sanjoy Cherian and Sanjay Giri.

The police said Naveen, a first year student of IIHM-Hyderabad, had enrolled at the Institute through an all-India examination conducted by Pusa Institute in the Capital.

Naveen, along with his father Matadin Sirohiwal who is manager in the R.K. Puram branch of Canara Bank, had gone to Hyderabad in mid-July. He had got accommodation at Tapaswi Hostel of the Institute. The new session began on July 25.

On July 31 evening, Naveen along with another classmate from Assam went to a nearby market to buy books. A group of seniors -- Mayank, Himanshu, Nitish and Nimesh -- happened to spot them there. They took them to their rented accommodation in Vidya Nagar.

Two other seniors, Sanjoy Cherian and Sanjay Giri, both third year students, joined them a little later.

The seniors allegedly asked Naveen and his classmate to remove their clothes and ordered him to stand in a bending position as if sitting on a chair.

After some time, a tired Naveen fell down. The seniors then allegedly beat him up for "not obeying their orders".

One of the seniors then brought a kitchen knife and put it beneath Naveen's haunches to keep him in the "sitting" position, the police said. A few minutes later, Naveen lost his cool.

He picked up the same knife and then allegedly attacked Sanjoy and Sanjay.

Fearing that Naveen may attack them too, all the seniors fled from the spot. Sanjoy, son of a marketing executive in Delhi, and Sanjay, son of a former Army personnel from Meerut in Uttar Pradesh, were later declared brought dead in a nearby hospital.

Following the incident, Naveen rushed back to his hostel, packed his luggage and left for Nagpur by road in the night. He reached Nagpur the next morning from where he boarded Delhi-bound G.T. Express around 10-30 a.m.

He reached New Delhi railway station on Wednesday and checked-in at the passenger's waiting room. He had been staying there since.

According to an earlier version, the seniors had spotted the freshers consuming beer in a local market.

When they objected, Naveen allegedly got angry.

As per his version, he along with a couple of juniors barged into their room and argued with Sanjoy and Sanjay. He then allegedly picked up a knife and attacked them.